What Makes a Marriage Successful? (And Why Divorce Does Not Mean Failure)

Kindness #9

(c) Mary Lou Q

Having gone through a divorce myself, I’ve often wondered why we look on staying married or getting a divorce as a defining success or failure in life.
As I’ve learned more about the person I was married to, it became clear that divorce was a blessing for me.


Some marriages that remain in tact can be abusive and the people inside them become “cell mates” instead of “soul mates”.
Another blogger opened up this discussion with a great post and I’m sharing it with you. ~ Mary Lou ~

(Be sure to click on “Original Post” to read full post!  Thanks!)

Lessons From the End of a Marriage

I’ve always found it funny/sad how we classify marital success purely by its duration. I mean, imagine if we applied this same metric to other areas of our lives –

She was a really great student – she was in school for fifty years!

He was an amazing dog, but he was a failure as a pet because he died before he turned ten.

It was a wonderful dinner. The service was so slow that the meal lasted for hours!

I’m afraid I have to give the book only one star because it ended.

Pretty crazy, huh?

So why do we then so easily apply this faulty logic to marriages? Classifying them as failures if they end and successes if they persist?

I think we all have seen (either from within or from the outside looking in), marriages that go the duration yet are filled with contempt, isolation and misery.

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