Me in the Middle ~ WordPrompt ~ Bridge

WordPress is helping us break the blogger’s block. It just might work for me! It’s got me thinking about the March word prompt ~ BRIDGE.

Looking back over my life I can see the different ways that I saw a bridge, sometimes real and sometimes a metaphor. A bridge is a way to get you to the other side when it would be impossible to get there without a lot of difficulty.

It’s like a midwife assisting the birth of a new life. When we’re born we’re thrust into the world and the midwife is there to guide and make the process less challenging.

Growing up there were two bridges that come to mind; one is the George Washington Bridge and the others are the smaller bridges over brooks, creeks and streams while exploring nature around my area which was pre-suburban at that time. The GWB was ominous and high above the Hudson River, carrying us away from our little village in New Jersey into the concrete jungle of the big city. The brooks, creeks and streams were fun to cross over, leaping from stone to stone or across logs that were laid out for crossing the water.

One symbolic bridge was the moving into adult life which, for a young woman back in the late fifties and early sixties, was marriage and starting a family. Part of that symbolism was that the man you married would be there for you in a supportive way throughout your life together. A bridge to support you emotionally and financially during good times and bad. ‘Love is all you need’, only it wasn’t all you need.

Around 1970, as a mother of four little ones and watching the upheavals brought about by the Vietnam War, I turned inward to find peace and hope. My husband had moved from job to job and then unemployed. It was stressful times for us and for our country. There were songs that moved me to trust and hope that we would make it through. One was ‘Let it Be’ by the Beatles and the other was ‘Bridge Over Troubled Waters‘ by Simon and Garfunkel.

That song, ‘Bridge Over Troubled Waters‘ had two meanings for me at the time. One was inspired by the Jesus Movement (Charismatic Renewal) which opened me up to a simpler faith. “The Spirit is within you.” The other was for myself ~ to be a bridge over troubled waters for others in my life. It brought me a centering peace. It helped me focus on my immediate responsibilities and Trust.

From that point on, bridge became a metaphor for me of finding a path to my inner strength ~ to be a bridge over troubled waters for myself in my own life guided by Love. At times it was through reaching out to others during a time a crisis and seeking a bridge to help me cross into better times. I learned the limits of others in their ability to be that bridge for me. I learned that I was, for the most part, alone on that path and trusted that there would be a bridge there for me as I moved forward.

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Me in the Middle of Always Letting Go

Letting Go Post Aug 16

 

Letting Go

To ‘let go’ does not mean to stop caring.  It means I can’t do it for someone else.

To ‘let go’ is not to cut myself off.  It’s the realization I can’t control another.

To ‘let go’ is not to enable but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To ‘let go’ is to admit powerlessness which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To ‘let go’ is not to try to change or blame another.  It’s to make the most of myself.

To ‘let go’ is not to care for but to care about.

To ‘let go’ is not to fix but to be supportive.

To ‘let go’ is not to judge but to allow another to be a human being.

To ‘let go’ is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes but to allow others to affect their own destinies.

To ‘let go’ is not to be protective.  It’s to permit another to face reality.

To ‘let go’ is not to deny but to accept.

To ‘let go’ is not to nag, scold or argue but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.

To ‘ let go’ is not to adjust everything to my desires but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.

To ‘ let go’ is not to regret the past but to grow and live for the future.

To ‘ let go’ is to fear less and love more.

Author Unknown

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I want to fix things!  I want to heal the world and make things all better.  I recognized this about myself going back to when I was a young wife and mother.  Yes, I’m a rescuer and a co-dependent.  My heart fills with love and breaks when I see suffering in the world.  Over and over I’ve had to remind myself to step back and be in the middle of things yet apart from it.  Things that I can’t fix…that I have no control over need to be let go. 

 * Like what’s going on in my country right now.  *

* Like the punch in the gut when we learned about predator priests in the Catholic Church. *

  These things draw me in and break my heart.  I want to fix it.  Sometimes letting go means ‘holding space’ for someone or something when we’re on the threshold of change and we’re not sure where it’s taking us.  Sometimes stepping back and allowing that space means remaining in relationship in a supportive way.  Sometimes stepping back means leaving that relationship and setting healthy boundaries so you can move forward and recover. 

Forgiveness is possible.  Restoring relationship not always possible.  Restoring trust is up to the one who betrayed that trust.  We can’t fix things on our own.

To ‘ let go’ is to fear less and love more.

 

Letting Go Let It Be